Tuesday, Week 5.....Jack, it's so cold!

Maybe you know already, but I accidently posted this on my regular blog...feck. It was supposed to go here, on the running blog, the more important one. Read on, if you would like to:

Jack, Anton, Ben, Rose, Marcy, Drake, Linus, Adrianna...it's so feckin cold!

Not really. It wasn't really that cold outside, but there was feckin rain. I like those runs in 10 degrees and snow, but when there is rain and it is 34 it is much more miserable. The rain fecks you, man, it's like a goat feckin you the whole time, the precipitation getting soaked up by the shirt, the shirt that I wear over the microfiber base layers, the shirt that is actually a turtleneck, the neck of a turtle I wear. Turtle power, feck!

I need to get an outside layer, one that repels water. Anton, you swindler, I wanted to wear the white and black Nike jacket, the one that doesn't have any lining, but it has been sent to you. Not really, you are not a swindler, you do not swindle me. You do not swindle my money, or swindle my goats.

Remember the goat? Remember when you got me with the goat those times after swimming? Yes, the image is burned in my mind. It haunts me during the night. When it is dark and I can't see, I imagine that the goat is going to attack me. Blankets as protection? No. Nothing can stop the goat.

So it was a cold run. 6 miles easy. The hip/groin/whatever-the-feck-it-is didn't hurt too much. I think maybe it is just tight. I don't know. I am not a) a psychic, b) a physical therapist, c) a genius. I am not Nostradamus. I am not a French apothecary from sixteenth century France. I am a citizen of the United States of America. I used to like The Presidents of the USA, used to listen to them often. I still know a lot of the words to their songs, songs such as Kitty, Dune Buggy, Peaches, etc.

•••••

PT today. I thought I would be an allstar and do a superset, not in 20 minutes, but in less. I planned to not take breaks, and be done in 15 minutes, but it actually, somehow, took longer, more like 30 something minutes. Feck.

Did 10 sets of 8 dips, 20 pushups, 20 situps, 8 pullups.

In the afternoon, the time after noon, but before night, I did 2x90 fire haulers (as Ben has coined them), and 2x35 neck. Actually, I have only done one set of the fire haulers so far. I plan to do the others right now. Hold on...

(time is passing; please be patient!)

...

Okay. Both sets of fire haulers done. They seemed easier than last week and weeks prior to last week. Probably the easiest they have ever felt. Maybe I am going too fast? I was hauler them like a truck hauls goods, like hoodlums haul ass when the cops are coming. Or maybe they felt good because I have had a lot of rest on the fire haulers (I haven't done them since Thursday). Maybe I am building strength.

The pullups felt awesome today! Hooray! The dips...they were sort of a struggle. The pushups, fine. The situps...well, I was afraid they were going to aggravate the hip/groin/testicles, but they didn't. Not really.

Neck time.

(hold)

...

Okay. 1st set done. I will not take breaks like this anymore. I will refrain from possibly boring you. Sure, you may be a little bored now, but I don't want to make you any more bored.

•••••

Totals today:

6 miles
80 dips
200 pushup
200 situps
80 pullups
180 fire haulers
70 neck

•••••

Another thing I'm going to talk about is my defecation patterns. In the past few days I have been defecating less. I think I am burning all the food I put into my body, thus there is little waste. I don't know why this shoudl be happening, as I haven't been overly physical the past week. And it seems that I might be losing a little bit of that extra or not extra fat plastered to my front. I don't know why this should be happening, not with me eating four bowls of cereal at 11:20 pm after I came home from work. Maybe my metabolism is going into overdrive. Sort of like how a bear hibernates, except exactly the opposite.

I will need to make sure to get the calories in my body. I should be, considering that I have been eating a lot of chocolate lately. I ate like 65% of a big bag of Raisinettes the other day. They are just so good!

Now my stomach is growling at me, making sounds like a ferocious lion. I will have to put pizza into my body.

I also haven't been eating much meat, because, since I have been driving by the meat packaging plant in Gibbon each time I go to Kearney, I keep thinking of the cows being hauled in, the fear, the fright, the confusion, the cramped conditions, the killing, the blood, the sounds, the stench, the blood, the instruments they use to kill the cows, the dead meat falling onto the floor, etc. etc. That is what I think about when there is meat.

Chicken is not too bad, but then I watched this movie called Chicken Run, made in 2000 by Dreamworks, a children's movie. But I watched the movie, and felt bad for the chickens because all they wanted to do was live and have freedom and feel green grass beneath their awkward, dry, almost scaley chicken feet, but no, they couldn't, because the farmer wanted to feck them up by chopping their heads off with an axe. I felt bad for the chickens. I don't want chickens to die, or any animal to die, unless it has to be killed, like in the case of being attacked by hornets or being chased by a rabid animal. I would feck the rabid animal up so hard that it wouldn't even look like an animal anymore; it would like like a pile of bloody rags. Yes, this is probably too much information, stuff that you probably didn't want me to say, about the nasty pile of bloody-looking-rag-once-used-to-be-a-living-animal-but-now-rabid-crazy-threatening-savage.

I think now is a good time to stop. I have seriously been writing for about 20 minutes, and my computer only has 11 minutes of life. It is a laptop. It is not plugged in to the electrical outlet.

Okay, hope this blog was fun. I hope you found humor, had some laughs, attained valuable information about my life, and maybe discovered truth. TRUTH, that philosophical idea, what is it? What the feck is it?

Do you know?